Blue Christmas
by Minx
Some dive bar in Barstow, California
Christmas Eve, 2002
*phone ringing*
“Hello?”
“Saaaaammmmeeeee!”
“Dean?”
“Who the hell elsh callsh you…hic…callsh you Sammy?…dumbassh. hic”
“Dude. Have you been drinking?”
“No…hic…”
“Dean, man, you’re drunk dialing me? On Christmas Eve?”
“Merry fucking Chrishmash, Sam!”
….
“Sam?”
….
“Aw, c’mon, Sammy…it’s Chrishmash…Crimmas…dammit…Christ-mas. Heh, there, I got it.”
“Yeah. Merry Christmas to you too, Dean.”
“So, watcha doin?”
“I’m talking on the phone to my drunk-ass brother.”
“Hah, hah. Very funny. No, really. You havin’ some turkey and stuffin’ or maybe gettin’ ready for a party or something?”
“Yeah, right. Poor college student here, remember? I’m studying actually.”
“Dude, what kind of loser studies on Christmas Eve?”
“Okay, you know what? I’ve gotta go -”
“No! Sammy, c’mon! Don’t hang up on me!”
…
“Sam?” You still there?”
…
“Sammy?...Sammich?”
“Yes, allright? I’m still here. And stop calling me Sammy.”
“Heh, you’ll always be Sammy to me, Sammy. Hang on a sec’…gotta order ‘nother round…”
“Dean, maybe you should lay off the –“
“M’back. Kay, what were we talkin’ bout? Oh yeah, Christmas. Wish you were here, little bro.”
“No, you don’t.”
“What’re you talkin’ bout? Yeah, I do.”
“Yeah, well, Dad doesn’t want me there.”
“Now, see? You gotta go and be all Grinchy…”
“What? I’m not being grinchy!”
“Yeah, you are.”
“Bullshit!”
“Hey! Watch your mouth, smartass or I’ll have to drive all the way to…um, where are you again?”
“Stanford….”
“Oh yeah! I knew that…drive all the way to Stanford and beat your little ass.”
“I’m not so little anymore, Dean.”
“Maybe not, but I’m still your big brother and I bet I can still haul you over my knee like I used to, so watch the attitude.”
*snort*
“What?”
“Nothing. Just remembering the last time you actually did try to spank me.”
“When was that?”
“When I was fifteen and threw that telephone book at you in Tulsa. Remember? I nailed you right in the face with it and man, you were so pissed. I’d just had that growth spurt and you fell backwards off the edge of the bed when you tried to haul me over your lap.”
“Oh yeah…we both ended up on the floor, didn’t we?”
“Heh, yeah…”
“And yet, I still paddled your ginormous ass raw, didn’t I?”
“True.”
“Big brother always wins, Sammy.”
“Whatever.”
“Truth, dude.”
“Look, Dean, it’s late and I really do need to study…”
“Yeah, sure, okay. I just wanted to, you know, wish you a Feliz Navidad and all.”
“You too.”
“And you know, despite what you think… Dad misses you too. He just doesn’t know how to say it sometimes.”
“Right. Whatever. I’ll talk to you soon, okay?”
“Sure, Sammy. Hope you’ve been a good boy so Santa leaves you a hot chick in your stocking tomorrow morning. ”
“Dude, seriously.”
“What? You batting for the other team now, college boy? What red-blooded guy wouldn’t want a –“
“Dean! I got it, okay?”
“Merry Christmas, bro.”
“Merry Christmas, Dean.”
…
“Dean, you have to hang up or the connection isn’t broken.”
“I know…”
…
“Dean…hang up…”
“You hang up.”
“Dude! What are you, twelve? Freaking hang up the phone.”
…
“Jerk…”
“Bitch…”
*dialtone*
THE END
Christmas Eve, 2002
*phone ringing*
“Hello?”
“Saaaaammmmeeeee!”
“Dean?”
“Who the hell elsh callsh you…hic…callsh you Sammy?…dumbassh. hic”
“Dude. Have you been drinking?”
“No…hic…”
“Dean, man, you’re drunk dialing me? On Christmas Eve?”
“Merry fucking Chrishmash, Sam!”
….
“Sam?”
….
“Aw, c’mon, Sammy…it’s Chrishmash…Crimmas…dammit…Christ-mas. Heh, there, I got it.”
“Yeah. Merry Christmas to you too, Dean.”
“So, watcha doin?”
“I’m talking on the phone to my drunk-ass brother.”
“Hah, hah. Very funny. No, really. You havin’ some turkey and stuffin’ or maybe gettin’ ready for a party or something?”
“Yeah, right. Poor college student here, remember? I’m studying actually.”
“Dude, what kind of loser studies on Christmas Eve?”
“Okay, you know what? I’ve gotta go -”
“No! Sammy, c’mon! Don’t hang up on me!”
…
“Sam?” You still there?”
…
“Sammy?...Sammich?”
“Yes, allright? I’m still here. And stop calling me Sammy.”
“Heh, you’ll always be Sammy to me, Sammy. Hang on a sec’…gotta order ‘nother round…”
“Dean, maybe you should lay off the –“
“M’back. Kay, what were we talkin’ bout? Oh yeah, Christmas. Wish you were here, little bro.”
“No, you don’t.”
“What’re you talkin’ bout? Yeah, I do.”
“Yeah, well, Dad doesn’t want me there.”
“Now, see? You gotta go and be all Grinchy…”
“What? I’m not being grinchy!”
“Yeah, you are.”
“Bullshit!”
“Hey! Watch your mouth, smartass or I’ll have to drive all the way to…um, where are you again?”
“Stanford….”
“Oh yeah! I knew that…drive all the way to Stanford and beat your little ass.”
“I’m not so little anymore, Dean.”
“Maybe not, but I’m still your big brother and I bet I can still haul you over my knee like I used to, so watch the attitude.”
*snort*
“What?”
“Nothing. Just remembering the last time you actually did try to spank me.”
“When was that?”
“When I was fifteen and threw that telephone book at you in Tulsa. Remember? I nailed you right in the face with it and man, you were so pissed. I’d just had that growth spurt and you fell backwards off the edge of the bed when you tried to haul me over your lap.”
“Oh yeah…we both ended up on the floor, didn’t we?”
“Heh, yeah…”
“And yet, I still paddled your ginormous ass raw, didn’t I?”
“True.”
“Big brother always wins, Sammy.”
“Whatever.”
“Truth, dude.”
“Look, Dean, it’s late and I really do need to study…”
“Yeah, sure, okay. I just wanted to, you know, wish you a Feliz Navidad and all.”
“You too.”
“And you know, despite what you think… Dad misses you too. He just doesn’t know how to say it sometimes.”
“Right. Whatever. I’ll talk to you soon, okay?”
“Sure, Sammy. Hope you’ve been a good boy so Santa leaves you a hot chick in your stocking tomorrow morning. ”
“Dude, seriously.”
“What? You batting for the other team now, college boy? What red-blooded guy wouldn’t want a –“
“Dean! I got it, okay?”
“Merry Christmas, bro.”
“Merry Christmas, Dean.”
…
“Dean, you have to hang up or the connection isn’t broken.”
“I know…”
…
“Dean…hang up…”
“You hang up.”
“Dude! What are you, twelve? Freaking hang up the phone.”
…
“Jerk…”
“Bitch…”
*dialtone*
THE END